Get Inside My Time Machine, Me.

Ah, the ol' time machine. Yeahhh, the ol' so and so.

MAMAHAWK here.

So, what would you do if you could travel back in time? 

I have a fantasy of sorts...a time travel fantasy, if you will. Yeah, I wanna travel back to when I first thought about posting this blog, and then hit on myself. You know, get "self aroused". I'd sneak up behind me and start rubbing my shoulders, because I know I had a rough day today, so I'm sure I would appreciate that. Now, the important question is, would that be considered gay? Like, you know, homosexual? You know what I'm sprayin??

Anyways, I imagine I'd take my shirt off and maybe put on a romantic record, like that new Diana Ross record I got at the thrift store. I might make light chit chat about that funny thing that happened at the gas station this morning, you know, just to break the ice with myself. The hard part would be to make myself laugh and loosen up, but I am quite the charmer, so I'd give myself a little time to warm up to myself. Oh, I have that secret bottle of Jamaican Rum I've been saving for a special occasion, maybe I could pour some in a glass with a few chunks of ice, a squirt of lime, and toss in a light snack. 

Then, I'd turn off the computer and tell myself to "just relax, it's just me...you". But the important part here is to determine whether or not this is gay. See, I wouldn't continue if I knew I was committing a deadly sin. That shit would suck so so bad. I really don't want to go to Hell, I think it would not be so cool.   

Oh, I just arrived, gotta go. I am looking really good, where did I get that tie? Oh that's right, Mom gave that to me for my birthday last year. I'll consider the gay issue tomorrow, for now, I just want a little "me time". 

So lol. 

-MAMAHAWK'D. 

(worse case scenario imagined below)